The Pastor's wife...

        If you want to REALLY tick my wife off, when you see her volunteering, try to encourage her by saying: "You're such a great supporter of your husband." She'll tell you REALLY quickly that she doesn't volunteer to "support" her husband. She serves God in our church because she feels CALLED to do so BY GOD!
       Almost every church planting assessment process will tell you that spousal "support" is an important milestone in the process. I think they're wrong. Spousal "support" is not enough. Without Spousal CALLING most of us will not make it!If you're a Pastor who feels called to plant a church, you had better have a wife who feels CALLED to plant the church with you! Pastors, whatever you do, don't glaze over the process of helping your wife nail down and confirm the call from God to help you plant a church. Without that process and call, you are going to be in trouble.  Here are some pointers to help your spouse discover and embrace the church planting spiritual journey as their unique calling:

* Pray with your wife AT LEAST weekly. Pray that God will give both of you unity in God's call on your lives.

* Tell your wife right now that she has VETO power in your church planting decision. If she does not feel called of God to plant this church WITH you, tell her you will NOT do it. This will take ENORMOUS pressure off her and free her up to listen to God!

* Don't overemphasize faith with your wife. Talk about the facts, too. Show her that you have a plan to attempt to finance the mission. Do your homework. Share stats and census information.

* Encourage your wife. Let her know that you see the unique gifts that God has given her that could be used so significantly in the church.

* Take a weekend and go visit a successful church plant and allow your spouse to spend time with the Pastor's wife. If you;re in ATL, my wife would love to meet your wife and hang out!

* Promise your wife that if you plant this church, you won;t stick her in teh children's ministry forever, and keep your promise (Glad to say I did this)!

* Date your wife. If your wife believes you REALLY love and value her over everything else, she will follow you any where, even when it seems stupid!

Comments

[Jessica Cornelius]

Shawn,
The information you shared was exactly what Bil and I did when we started our church. I always wanted to know the "equation" to how to be a pastor's wife. What I have learned over the years is that there is no one equation, because all pastor's wives have different personalities and are in different seasons of life. The solution is to love the Lord and let that love lead you in your own personal way...which by the way, your wife is a wonderful example!

[Jeff Green]

Great post! I loved many of your suggestions and found them particularly helpful as my wife and I pray through our own passion for church planting.